About Us

Steph

1. What does SFL stand for? Stephanie Fenxi Ling.
2. What does TCH stand for? The Crimson Harlot.
3. Do you wish on stars? Yes, but only in case it'll help us win the cricket.
4. Which finger is your favorite? I hate them all because they're so shit.
5. When did you cry last? Just after we got knocked out of the World Cup early and Nass resigned as ODI captian, but only because I lost concentration and had a particularly painful fall that day.
6. Do you like your handwriting? Yes, it's wonderful.
7. What is your favourite lunch meat? I'm not fussy, as long as I have some form of pickle/chutney to go with it.
8. Any bad habits? Just think about me for a moment. And then stop when you're annoyed.
9. What is your most embarrassing CD on the shelf? The embarrassing ones aren't on the shelf. Oh no, hang on... Chas and Dave's Rock 'n' Roll Knees Up.
11. Are you a daredevil? No, I'm just stupid and ignorant.
12. Have you ever told a secret you swore not to? Of course. I'm a bloody-minded repressed psychopath. Deal with it.
13. Do looks matter? I'd be lying if I said no, but after a while, I hardly notice anyway.
14. Have you ever misused a word and it sounded absolutely stupid? Yes.
15. Do you think there is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow? No. I'm only optimistic about cricket and God. Not gold. Though you can see the similarility. Or maybe it's just me.
16. Do fish have feelings? Probably, but they forget about them every three seconds or whatever.
17. Is Steph great? Incredibly. If I was a bloke, I'd marry her. If I was Nasser Hussain, I'd leave my wife and two children for her. If I was insane, I'd give her all my money.
18. How do you release anger? I release my anger in every waking minute. And sometimes when I'm asleep as well. The relase of anger is as normal as the relase of energy during respiration, but slightly more noticeable. See 12.
19. Where is your second home? Literally, Malaysia. Only a twelve-hour plane journey to KL, two-hour journey to Kuching and half-hour journey to Sibu away.
20. Do you trust others easily? No. Again, see 12.
21. What was your favourite toy as a child? Piglet-Bunny!
22. What class in school do you think is totally useless? RE. 23. Do you like soppy love songs? No. See 12.
24. Have you ever been on radio or television? Yes. Shula - remember Wiltshire Sound? I don't think any of you will have seen me on Hospital Watch aged three days, though.
25. Tell us about your family. My adoptive family is of Afro-Caribbean origin. My father is a pimp daddy in Bristol, my mother is a Lilt lady and my adoptive brother Toby is the coolest guy on the Warwick campus - he's all bling and yo. Y'know?
26. Do you use sarcasm a lot? I'd like to think of it more as irony.
27. Have you ever been in a mosh pit? Hell, I start the mosh pit.
28. What do you look for in a guy/girl? I dunno. Keanu Reaves, but Catholic and a cricketer. Is that asking for too much?
29: What are your nicknames: Little Lamb Chops, mysteriously given to me in physics just now.
30. Would you bungee jump? No.
31. Do you un-tie your shoes when you take them off? Shoelaces? They sound complicated...
32. What are you worried about right now? Playing Bangladesh at cricket. So I suppose that answers 26.
34. Do you think that you are strong? Stronger than you think I am [Toby]...
35. What's your favorite ice cream flavor? I'm not fussy, but I like to have a flake and a wafer as well. Mmm...
36. What's your favorite colour? Red, just like blood. See 12.
37. What is your least favourite thing in the world? Shit, that's hard. I don't really hate any South Africans much now that we've beaten them, so it's between Aussies and stolid right-wingers... Ask me again after an Ashes series.
38. How many wisdom teeth do you have? None yet, thank goodness.
39. Are you in love with anyone? NASS!
40. How many people have a crush on YOU right now? Oh, I don't know, pick a number between 50 and 100.
41. Who do you miss most right now? Shaun Pollock, Craig Fanman and Toby
42. [There wasn't a 42, but I thought that this should have one for Douglas Adams' sake.] What's your favourite jelly flavour? Lime, and not in a pretentious way.

Peace out,
Steph.

Toby

1. What does SFL stand for? Scottish Football League? No? Hang on, I have it. Water. ie Something Frogs Like. Let's move on shall we...
2. What does TCH stand for? Toby Christopher Hester.
3. Do you wish on stars? No, but I do sometimes stare at them and feel pleased to be in the world. Then I wonder if I'm too stuck to order, like Javert in Les Miserables, and whether I'll end up throwing myself off a bridge in Paris when someone merciful but subversive saves my life. Then I smirk.
4. Which finger is your favorite? The second finger on my right hand is crucial for impressions of The Claw aka Billy Bowden.
5. When did you cry last? Possibly the last time I watched The Lion King. I got a bit tearful during that bit with Sharon and Den on Eastenders. I over-identify with television programmes.
6. Do you like your handwriting? I don't hold anything against it, and it works as an impressively simple secret code, because no-one else can read it.
7. What is your favourite lunch meat? Bacon. Preferably with egg.
8. Any bad habits? What did Steph say? Yes, that should do.
9. What is your most embarrassing CD on the shelf? I don't have any CD's that I'm embarassed of. I only own Bob Dylan and classical music which I really like. Sorry.
11. Are you a daredevil? Yes, I spend my time parachuting, motorcycling at 120mph, and living in my kitchen. What more proof do you need?
12. Have you ever told a secret you swore not to? No. Not even that time when Darz told me he was gay and that he wasn't going to tell anyone else. What do you mean you know?
13. Do looks matter? I wouldn't find life so easy if I was blind. I need the odd look to check where I'm going. And yes, but not for long.
14. Have you ever misused a word and it sounded absolutely stupid? Indubitably.
15. Do you think there is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow? Only in Ireland. Does nobody learn their superstitious rules any more?
16. Do fish have feelings? As I've never heard any blues music by fish, I guess not. Oh, hang on a moment. What about sole music?
17. Is Steph great? Yes. If I was a bloke I'd marry her.
18. 18. How do you release anger? I like throwing pens when maths equations don't work. Otherwise, usually a little bit of 'Blood on the Tracks' works.
19. Where is your second home? Earlsdon. Or 158, Bath Road Bradford. Or 25 Meadowfield. It depends which order my homes are in.
20. Do you trust others easily? Hang on. Why are you asking?
21. What was your favourite toy as a child? Bearbo.
22. What class in school do you think is totally useless? The working class.
23. Do you like soppy love songs? Yes. But only 'Moon River'. And all those old jazz standards. And I think I'm supposed to say the Carpenters.
24. Have you ever been on radio or television? Yes, I starred in the Bath Festival opening night in 1998, playing Bass Clarinet with Millan. We got to talk to Henry Kelly, from 'Going for Gold'. I'm still recovering from the ecstasy. The emotion.
25. Tell us about your family. When I was ten, my parents divorced. My adopted mother remarried, while my father took a new partner. Therefore, I have a brother, one half-brother, two step-brothers, one sort-of-step-brother, one sort-of-step-sister, one cat, one hamster, and a Steph. If you'd like a copy of my family tree, please click here and ask for Mr Dyke.
26. Do you use sarcasm a lot? [Checks above questions.] You tell me
27. Have you ever been in a mosh pit? Yes, oddly. I don't think I was wearing my glasses.
28. What do you look for in a guy/girl? A slightly distanced interest, an ability to listen well as well as talk articulately. Humanity. Human-ness.
29: What are your nicknames: I only do nick-names for other people. Some name-less geniuses call me 'Tobe'. Miraculously inventive.
30. Would you bungee jump? How much?
31. Do you un-tie your shoes when you take them off? Shoelaces? No, they're already undone, you fool.
32. What are you worried about right now? Writing this, replying to Megan, writing an essay, making a doctor's appoitment and getting a new University card before 5pm. Oh, the stresses of being Toby.
34. Do you think that you are strong? Stronger than you think I am [Steph]...
35. What's your favorite ice cream flavor? Vanilla. All others are over-involved procrastinations.
36. What's your favorite colour? Blue.
37. What is your least favourite thing in the world? Horses on roads. And double-standards in a supposedly feminist era. And Tuesdays. And indecisive people.
38. How many wisdom teeth do you have? One - which means sorrow, right?
39. Are you in love with anyone? No.
40. How many people have a crush on YOU right now? 0, unless I hear otherwise.
41. Who do you miss most right now? Steph of course. (Honourable mentions: Henry Blofeld and Paul).
42. [There wasn't a 42, but I thought that this should have one for Douglas Adams' sake.] What's your favourite jelly flavour? Lemon. Proper jelly for non-pretentious people. See Steph (42)

Make jelly not war
Toby.

This questionnaire was forwarded to us by Megan Brand, so you have her to blame. Except for all the made up questions.

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